Infertility?

[ErbOrb]

Does having a total proctocolectomy (and a resulting ileostomy) cause infertility? I wish I knew for sure, but at the same time, I fear that the news would be devastating and I can at least cling to some hope -- however false it may be -- that I could still possibly experience the joy of parenthood some day. It really makes no difference anyway, since no woman will ever be interested in marrying and having a family with a deformed, disfigured, and hideous freak. So even if I'm not biologically infertile, I am still -- for all purposes -- socially infertile. Thanks Crohn's disease! I now wish that I had kept my diseased intestine, as I seem to be no better off without it than I was with it.

[hownlo]

Hello
I had an ostomy when I was 18. That was 65 years ago. I got married 62 years ago. It took me 4 yrs to get pregnant. Was getting worried,thought about adoption and was then pregnant. Had 2 children with no problems. Remember that was years ago. They know so much more these days.
Think positive. Lois

[ot dave]

No. Having a proctocolectomy, an ileostomy, a colostomy, or an urostomy in and of itself does not cause infertility. Other treatments such as chemo or radiation may affect fertility, but not an ileostomy by itself.
Anyone worth marrying and starting a family with will not have an issue with your ostomy.
Sounds like you are having some issues adjusting to having your ileostomy, which is totally normal. Depression is a well known result of having ostomy surgery. I would recommend seeking out a therapist to help you work through some of the issues you are sharing here. We can assist you with your ostomy issues, but for your mental health needs, I think you would be unsuccessful in getting the support you need on any discussion board.
I hope that helps some.

David

[To Dream a Dream]

Fully agreeing with Dave's post above, please also consider that many of the physical impacts (dehydration & the resultant electrolyte imbalance, poor nutritional absorption, lack of stamina, etc.) can definitely affect mood & mental outlook. Believe me, I have learned over these many years to immediately begin accessing my physical condition whenever I begin to feel down on myself. Do I need a glass of Pedialyte after exerting myself? Do I need to 'take five' & recoup? when was the last time I had my lytes checked? These are important considerations that unfortunately can be missed by even medical personnel unused to dealing with specific ostomy needs. I personally have been enduring a recent decline in health attributing it to old age, loss of friends & family members, isolation & stress brought on by the pandemic, etc. Long story short, I was blessed with the insight to have some more comprehensive lab work that revealed a Vitamin B1 deficiency. (Understandable since I am on a celiac diet & have a drastically shortened small bowel.) Contributing to both motor & mental effects.
I can empathize with your very valid emotional issues also. But have you ever considered giving yourself full credit for facing up to the challenge presented by Crohn's disease & ostomy surgery? It's not what any of us wanted, but it is something you can meet & overcome. Accept the fact that you are the hero in this very real life drama. And what true hero has an easy time of things? It's in how they manage adversity with grace & a willingness to use their own weaknesses to help others that defines them.
And as Dave suggests, by all means reach out for as much valid professional help & accurate information you can acquire. It will expand your support circle & encourage you to look beyond your limitations realistically.
Thank you for sharing some intense issues that affect us all.

[ron in mich.]

Hi ERB when i had my first ilieo. surgery 30 some years ago i experienced ED for awhile but about six months later my wife became pregnant with our second daughter.